The 'Maid' Truths :P

You know, there are lots of times in life when we’re asked about our families. Especially, being Indians, it’s a way of ‘getting to know each other’. So normally, when I’m asked that question, and I’m sure when you’re asked the same, we tend to reply by mentioning our parents, our siblings, sometimes grandparents and what they do. But it so happens, that there is another person, who really isn’t a part of one so-to-speak, but has the potential to absolutely and completely screw your happiness, and in severe cases, that of the entire family’s. And this person is a supreme must in today’s day and age..

WAIT FOR IT..

*Drumroll*

None other than THE MAID SERVANT!!

Or as some pseudo people like to call it – “Domestic Help”.

Now, it doesn’t matter how friendly your mum is with the rest of the world but this one relationship - with the maid - is what all mothers are very very cautious about. A perfect example of a love-hate relationship, it creeps out the women of this world more than they’d admit. From experience I can say, (and I’m no doctor – of any sort) that common symptoms of this illness are stress and sleepless nights, worry and more worry. Not having a maid is one fear that goes far beyond that of cockroaches, lizards and many other such beings.

So, today, I list down some universal truths about our beloved ‘domestic help’:

1.There is absolutely NO concept of a notice period in their profession. Accept it.

2.Every time you give them a holiday, please don’t expect them to be back the day they say they’re going to be back. They’re not. And you know it.

3.Items like ketchup and sugar should be strictly kept out of their reach since they have full potential to treat the former as ‘pyaaz tamatar ka tadka’ and mistake the latter for Salt!

4.DON’T expect them to wash your bathrooms daily. They’ll quit in the month.

5.And, do you REALLY want them to do jhaadu and pocha BOTH in the ENTIRE house every single day? If so, you gotta be kidding! More often than not, the hair is being taken away with a dripping wet mop. And it’s going to go down in history jus that way!

6.They take absolutely no responsibility for burning the milk after putting it to boil and running off to talk to the phone. No. It isn’t their fault!

And lastly,

7. It is their birthright to stand in the balcony and yap with the maid living across. So even if that means you’re doing the work in the kitchen, unka HAQ hai bhai!

But having said that, you’ve just gotta see the expression on your mum’s face when she opens the door and finds the maid standing outside. It’s better than one she’d give her husband after a long day of work.  :P It is truly priceless! And this is what they call ‘relief’ ;D